Is Khushoo R-rated?

Do you believe Khushoo is restricted to only adults?

I've heard too many times now that Khushoo or concentration in salah is something that we should not expect from children. I've heard people mention that the only important thing is to develop a habit in our children to pray, instruct them the step by step of salah and the words to say without focusing on Khushoo. I've heard so many tips about making them pray 1 prayer a day when they're 6 and then 2 a day at 7 and whatever comes next in this strategy which usually comes with golden stars and a candy jar for some reason. But we rarely hear about how to make a child love salah and how to give them the tools to empty their hearts when in salah and truly feel connected to their Rabb and to the words they are reciting. Personally, I'll always prefer a 7 year old who stays in sujood longer than the imam and is lost into his conversation with Allah than the same kid who knows all the steps and dos and don'ts of salah but has no idea what he's saying, why he's doing this and runs out of prayer rushing back to his video games. May Allah instill a pure and strong love for salah in our children. Ameen.

Basically, some parents believe that Khusoo is for Adults. But how many adults have difficulty praying with sincerity and khusoo? May Allah help us all. Ameen. Some may feel that because they have this difficulty themselves, their children would not be able to reach a high level of sincerity and concentration in their prayers. So my question is : Are we failing our kids in helping them pray with Khushoo now and for the rest of their lives?

I believe that Khusoo is something a muslim must work hard on, all of his life to perfect it and truly feel the sweetness of salah. I believe Khusoo is something that necessitates pure intentions, understanding of who Allah is and of the meanings of the words we recite.

A person who Thinks of Allah outside of His salah will have more facility in making his salah one that touches his heart and one that is rich in khusoo. On the other hand, someone who's mind and heart are not filled with the remembrance of Allah and with the understanding of who He is in His names and attributes will have all the trouble in the world to concentrate in salah.

Children who swim in the remembrance of Allah and who are taught the basic meanings of what they recite will have what it needs to water the seeds of khushoo in their salah. When the seeds of Khushoo are planted, the burden of making young children develop habit in praying is alleviated and salah comes more naturally in sha Allah. One of the benefits of Khushoo in salah is that it helps make the salah easy as verse 45 of surah Al Baqarah mentions: ''And seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, it is a burden except for the humble''

وَاسۡتَعِيۡنُوۡا بِالصَّبۡرِ وَالصَّلٰوةِ ​ؕ وَاِنَّهَا لَكَبِيۡرَةٌ اِلَّا عَلَى الۡخٰشِعِيۡنَۙ‏

This verse explains that the burden of prayer is heavy indeed, except for those who have khushoo‟. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/125)

Our prophet ﷺ has instructed us that : “The first thing to be lifted up (taken away) from this ummah will be khushoo‟, until you will see no one who has khushoo‟ (Saheeh al-Targheeb, no. 543)

Our prophet ﷺ taught the sahabas how to pray around 10 years after the start of him ﷺ teaching them about Allah, Tawheed, and about the message of islam from revelation. What makes us think that, as parents, our first step into making our children pray with sincerity is by teaching them the movements and ritual rather than by letting their hearts be touched by the Qur'an, and by deep understanding of who Allah is and what message He has for us?

Here are a few tips on how to improve khushoo in Salah in ourselves and our children:

Make Salah the number 1 priority in your home. Talk about salah with love and demonstrate that it is a priority by rotating your life to make it work around your salah and not by rotating your salah to make it fit around your life. Pray together with your children. Little cardboard mosques areas in their rooms are really cute and all but praying side by side in the family room , united is the way to go. Talk to your kids about what you tell Allah when in Sudjood, what types of things you confide to Him. Talk to them about the peaceful feeling you feel when you are finished praying. Make the time after salah a time of love and bonding. Cuddle, giggle and share heart to heart what it is you hope for, what it is you are grateful for etc. The people who look forward to salah and empty their hearts from all of the mundane tasks and occupations will find comfort in salah in sha Allah. The prophet ﷺ said : '' and my joy has been made in salaah'' (Saheeh al-Jaami 3124). May our joy rest in salah. Ameen.

''The Qur‟an was revealed to be pondered over. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “(This is) a Book (the Qur‟an) which We have sent down to you, full of blessings that they may ponder over its Verses, and that men of understanding may remember.” [Saad 38:29]. No one can ponder over its verses unless he has some knowledge of the meaning of what he is reciting, so that he can think about it and be moved to tears by it. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And those who, when they are reminded of the aayaat (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) of their Lord, fall not deaf and blind thereat.” [al-Furqaan 25:73]. Thus the importance of studying Tafseer (Qur‟an commentary) is quite clear. Ibn Jareer (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “I am astonished at people who read the Qur‟an and do not know what it means. How can they enjoy reading it?” (Muqaddimat Tafseer alTabari by Mahmood Shaakir, 1/10. ) For this reason it is important for the reader of Qur‟an to look at a Tafseer, even if it is abridged, when he is reading...Another way of helping oneself to ponder over the meanings is to repeat aayaat, because this will help one to think deeply and look again at the meanings. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to do this. It was reported that he spent a night repeating one aayah until morning came.'' (33 Ways of developing Khushoo’ in Salaah, Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid, page 10)

At Fitra Haven, we have short, fun and visual tafseers in the works, put into easy to comprehend language for children. The aim is to help our children truly connect with the words of Allah, the words they learn to recite sometimes as young as 2 and 3 years old but for too many, have no idea what they mean. The aim is to help our children easily recall and connect to the meanings of the verses so that these meanings become second nature to them and Khushoo in salah comes more easily in sha Allah. We use techniques that stick well especially with children who are visual learners but with adults too. Some adults have tested it and witnessed how it has changed their salah for the better subhanAllah! May Allah put barakah in our understanding of His words and may He instill a deep love for His words that makes Khushoo second nature. Ameen. Our first Visual Tafseer Curriculum is coming soon in sha Allah, stay tuned and invite anyone you feel could benefit from the page, to like and follow. JazakAllahu kheiran. Fitra Haven